How to Unshame your Visibility Online

Are you afraid of going live on social media?

Yep, I’ve been too. I thought it was the scariest thing and have been avoiding it for the longest time.

Aside from speaking freely and unscripted (I’ll share some cool hacks about that another time) and not being able to check and edit the video first before others see it—there’s been more to it for me.

It’s been the fear of creepy men watching me while going live.

Yes, we can block them afterwards. But at first, they do watch us. They’re like energetic vampires. The thought of that has been disgusting and unbearable for me.

This topic came up in my mastermind today. It’s a fear that’s holding back many women from showing up and expressing themselves freely. From sharing their juicy essence. From spreading their message.

Feeling vulnerable and exposed intensifies even more when we talk about deep feminine topics—and ESPECIALLY when we talk FROM it.

So what do we do?

Hide the most beautiful, precious, and important truth/ magic/ flow because there’s a lot of distortion in the world? Because it’s our “job” to “protect” it?

At least that’s what we’re being told. That’s what we’ve been trained to do as “good girls.”

Otherwise, we’re being told: “She’s asked for it.”

Molestation as a teenager is one of my most impactful traumas. And it’s so incredibly common. You too?

For me, the worst thing about it wasn’t even having been touched without consent. By a family member. What really messed me up was how I was met when I told my mother the night of.

She said: “Well, why do you always go to him?” That’s all. She never spoke to him. She never asked if I was okay. She never asked if it happened again. Apparently, it was on me and I had to deal with it.

So I didn’t talk about it for 25 years. I didn’t go to him anymore. And I pretended everything was fine, because I didn’t want to cause him any trouble.

What was way worse than having been molested was the was the silence around it, the feeling that it couldn’t be spoken about—till I finally had to, much later in life (and that was the most powerful experience that brought an unraveling of distortion in my lineage; sharing this story in my book >> see RESOURCES).

And also feeling somehow ashamed for it. While I didn’t entirely believe that it was my fault, since then I started being “careful” with pouring out my natural magic and love, especially with men. I didn't want to do anything wrong.

And the big fear underneath was: I could be misunderstood.

I noticed this was coming up again when it comes to visibility online. Because I thought: “My content isn’t for men and definitely not for creepy men. So I must be doing something wrong if they’re watching.”

Am I asking for it?

On top of that, the judgement from other women. Some even warned me. Asked me to change my online content.

So I really, deeply checked in with what I knew in this.

It’s clear: I’m not asking for it. I never have. Nobody does.

I also realized that it’s not true that my content is only for women. It’s for everyone who is resonating and willing to let their heart be touched by my words and my energy.

We have no control over the rest. Other than not answering or blocking people who choose to abuse energetically or with words.

And now that I’m 30 years wiser, I have to call on that bullshit: Women are blaming themselves and taking on responsibility for what is not theirs.

So, what really is your responsibility?

I know my responsibility is to what I deeply know. To be a vessel for it and let it flow through me. To let it surface and not cover it up. To share it freely and not hold back. To be a devotee and lover of the deep feminine. To speak about it and from it.

Even it’s sometimes very uncomfortable. Even if it costs me. Because that’s when it really matters.

And as with everything real, we can either allow it into our heart, let it resonate with what we deeply know, and be willing to be touched, gently taken apart, and deeply altered by it.

OR

We can feed it to distortion. Use it for our agendas, made-up issues, and fake identities. We can drag it through the dirt. It’s perfect material for that.

So whoever chooses the latter—that’s on them.

Don’t carry that for others. There are no victims of women radiating their life force and speaking what they know.

There’s so much fear being instilled into women of being "inappropriate."

But love, only you know.

When you check in honestly: Did you ask for it—or was that not your intention at all? Were you in your innocent, magical essence or were you manipulative? Did you dress up to seduce or did you dress up to express yourself?

It doesn’t matter what others say or think, because only you truly know.

There is a massive misunderstanding when it comes to sexuality, intimacy and expression.

Our source is life force. Sexuality. And the only true way of being and doing anything is intimately.

Being anything else is not being authentic, not being aligned with what you came from and what you really are. The cost of it is enormous. I believe it’s much bigger than we can fathom.

It’s what we came here for. If we miss that, we miss everything.

So is it really our job to hide and protect that?

First of all, again—the responsibility of other people giving into distortion is not yours.

Second, does it really make sense to hide it when a world full of distortion needs more of the real?

Third, does it truly need protection? The most real, most ancient, most powerful force on earth and beyond?

And: What’s at stake if we shy away because it’s uncomfortable? If we hide. If we hold back.

This might be one of your most incredible opportunities.

As I was feeling and pondering all of this, I saw something else. I saw that the most terrible part for me isn’t even the thought of someone getting off on me online. Or even in real life (Goddess forbids it happens again).

It’s actually my own judgement about it: ”This is so evil and it is not allowed to happen.”

It’s my not-okayness. In deeper reality, that’s the only thing that’s really wrong about it.

I know, this is an intense change of perspective for most of us. I’m still working on letting it in fully. But I know it. I really know the truth of it.

(And that doesn’t mean that in actuality we shouldn’t do everything in our might to protect ourselves and others from an actual assault—obviously.)

I know that I can be okay in anything. However, not being true to myself, not expressing what I really am, not being aligned with the magical, juicy flow that’s ready to gush out of me any moment I stop covering it up—that would be the real loss. And that would be on me.

And you know what? Being misunderstood by some is a necessary part of it. Otherwise, you couldn’t get really gotten by others. When you’re coming to a point where you’re not vanilla anymore, where people split around you, where not anyone can relate—that’s it!

So it’s not a bad thing. It’s a sign that you’re doing it right. Being misunderstood by some is of the essence.

Next time you’re being misunderstood, you might remember this. When it burns so bad. When you long so badly to be truly seen and heard.

If the other person would only understand you, right? I found explaining myself rarely ever worked.

But there’s something we can do. Here it is:

Speak from it. And if the other is not ready to receive, maybe don’t even speak much at all. Just be it. Be it so that it’s simply undeniable. Undeniably real. So thick and rich and juicy in the space—even the online space—other people might not understand, but they actually can’t miss it.

The part in them that’s real does get touched—even if they won’t admit. Even if they do something dishonest with their energy. And they might only truly see much later. Maybe not even in this lifetime. But that’s not your job to change that.

What is our job?

I believe with all my heart that we need to stop hiding what’s most precious. Especially as women. That we need to let ourselves be entirely visible if we want to have what we truly desire in our heart.

Unadorned. In all our beauty. And in all the rest. All of you.

Let it gush out. Show up while you’re shaking. You don’t need to be perfect first. Being real you is the real beauty. That is what is truly mesmerizing and addictive. That is what we are all really longing to see in each other.

I’m not saying everyone has to post on social media or do lives—but if you have that desire and you’ve been holding back, then this is for you.

I created something for us: A Visibility Challenge—From Ashamed to Unchained! 👇

__________________________________________________________________________________

Join my VISIBILITY CHALLENGE while it's FREE! (This will be a paid program the next round).

As a recovering "good-girl" who's been trained to not be "too loud", not "inconvenience" anyone & not "embarrass" myself or others, I want to challenge myself for 11 days to be next level SEEN online—and I want to bring you on board of this party train!

I found the most EMBODIED TRANSFORMATIONS in my life have been in containers with other brave, like-hearted women who were done trying to act like normies.

Don't worry, I won't ask you to do anything extreme...

⭐️Let's just be a bit louder, where we're usually quiet (because we we too afraid of doing something wrong)

⭐️Let's take up a tad more space where we used to shrink & hide

⭐️Let's be a bit bolder where we'd usually hold back

11 Days of Prompts, Hacks, Transmissions & Community to Burn your Generational Chains & Be as Free as your Magical Little Girl Wanted to Be.

We'll replace:

🔥Self Doubt with Fun

🔥Feeling Alone with Doing it with other Brave Goddesses

🔥Being Ashamed with Being Unchained

✨WHAT IF after 11 days of committing to stop hiding & be VISIBLE—your life unfolds in unexpected, luminous ways you couldn't have planned even if you tried to?

✨WHAT IF others seeing MORE OF YOU, parts of you that you've been shying away from, resonating with exactly that vulnerable thing you finally shared [what a relief!], reaching out to you & sharing something they've never felt safe enough to talk about, and you bond for a lifetime?

✨WHAT IF just by the nature of your bold, authentic RESONANCE you signal to the universe that you're a match for new opportunities that are so unreal, you could have not even dreamed of?

✨WHAT IF this heals old core wounding that you're still carrying even after therapy, coaching, and shadow work—you finally realize that you're really ok just the way you are?

✨WHAT IF your visibility isn’t just about you—but the signal that awakens a spark, a permission, a movement in others that they've been waiting for?

Curious enough?!

Come on, what do you have to lose other than your nice held-together self-image & some not aligned followers? :-P

Email UNCHAINED to [email protected] for the link to private group.